**A/N: I REALLY struggled with this chapter. Like, staring at every day for two months and not being able to make any progress, struggled. To finally get past the section that was giving me the most trouble, I just kind of jotted down roughly what happens, and I’ll eventually write that scene out in full when the book is finished and is ready for edits. That particular part is just one short paragraph or two and is in bolded present tense. I normally wouldn’t post it like that, but you’ve waited two months for the next chapter already, and I have a feeling that it would take another two just to get past it for whatever reason. So, without further ado, let’s jump in
NOT EDITED
Bridget pulled into Gerry’s driveway only seconds after he’d pulled out of it. “Oh, my God. Jeff!” The tires had hardly stopped turning before she threw open the door and ran up to the bleeding deputy. She dropped to her knees beside him, quickly shrugging off her coat to press it into the wound. “Jeff? Biggs, are you with me?”
“Mm… mmhmm.” He grunted, pointing back toward the road with his one unbloodied hand. “He just… They’re…”
“It’s okay. It’s gonna be okay.” She looked down at the blood seeping into the knees of her pants. “Oh, Jesus, Biggs.”
“No good, huh?”
“It’s not great,” Bridget whispered.
“Thought so. Felt like… a lot.”
“It is.”
“Kiss me.”
“Absolutely not. You’re not dying on me, Biggs.”
“If I do, you’re gonna… gonna feel real mean and guilty for that,” Jeff argued, his eyes closed.
“You’re not. I need you to hold the button on your radio for me.”
“Sure. But it’ll cost ya.”
Bridget shook her head before leaning down to kiss him. His lips were already cold. Jeff buried a hand in her hair, letting it fall to the radio pinned near his shoulder as she pulled away. She kept her forehead leaned against his, her eyes squeezed shut. Whatever meant she didn’t have to watch his blood seep between her fingers and run down the driveway any longer. “This is Decker. I-I’m with Deputy Biggs. He’s been shot. Umm, o-outside Gerry Schutt’s house. Th-the address—”
“I’ve got it,” a woman said on the other end. “I’ll send out an ambulance. Is he breathing?”
“Yeah. And he’s conscious.”
“Is Gerry there?”
Jeff shook his head against Bridget’s. “No,” Bridget said.
“Do you know where he is?”
“Took the kids,” Jeff whispered. “Drove… drove away. North.”
“He took Logan and Bonnie in a car. They were headed north,” Bridget said.
“What kind of car?”
“Bonnie’s,” Jeff said, a little louder than the last statement.
“Okay. I’ll get a BOLO put out. North is…”
“The lake,” Jeff finished.
“Can you contact Dallas or Bo? Let them know that he’s probably coming out to the lake?” Bridget asked. “They were supposed to be checking for Rick there, but they might’ve already left. Tell them to go back.”
“I will, ma’am,” the dispatcher assured. “Fire and rescue is on the way.”
***
Rick had willingly let Caleb ‘force’ him into the driver’s seat of Heidi’s car. Had willingly followed Caleb’s directions to the lake, mostly unworried about the handgun’s muzzle digging into his side.
Even if Rick had been willing to hurt Caleb to get away, he didn’t know where ‘Zak’ was, who he was, or where he was keeping Bonnie and Logan. Sure, he could start with Carol’s neighbors again, but if he wasn’t one of them, if he wasn’t there, he’d have to wait on another phone call, and if Rick didn’t play along, he wasn’t so sure that ‘Zak’ would hold up his end of the deal. Rick’s life for the kids’. He could play along with that. ‘Zak’ could get what he wanted — a dead Rick Downs — and the kids would be safe.
Rick could accept that.
“Slow down and drive past the parking lot. Enter from the far end,” Caleb said from the backseat.
Rick did as told, clearing his throat as they neared the far entrance. “What are you looking for? Zak?”
“Making sure none of your friends are here.”
“I didn’t tell anyone where I was going,” Rick assured. “That was part of the deal. I’ve kept my end of that.”
“That doesn’t mean they aren’t looking for you. If I were a cop, I’d certainly start at the lake.”
“Right.” Rick shifted in the seat. “Satisfied no one’s here?”
“Not no one. Just not your friends.”
“Of course,” Rick said, his voice quiet.
“Pull in.”
Rick turned into the small lot, parking next to the only other car there. Bonnie’s. He cut the engine before letting his hands fall to his lap. “I know you don’t want those kids to get hurt, Caleb. I know you don’t see that as justice.”
“He isn’t going to hurt the kids. They’d be dead already if he was going to,” Caleb said. “They’re just… a tool. Pawns. To get to you.”
Rick forced himself to nod. “If there’s… any indication that he’s going to hurt them—”
“I would kill him before I let him hurt one of those kids. I-I didn’t support what he did to that old lady. I didn’t even support taking Bonnie. Or your boy.”
“Why’d you go along with it, then?”
“For my family. For their justice.”
“Even when you believed he was going too far?” Rick asked, lifting his gaze to the rearview mirror. Caleb was turned toward the window, staring off into the trees. “Did he threaten you?”
“Vaguely.”
“Would a good man do that, Caleb?” Rick asked.
Caleb turned, eyes shifting to meet Rick’s in the mirror. “You aren’t going to get into my head, Rick.”
“I’m not trying to, Caleb, I swear. I’m just… trying to get us on the same page. Did he make you kill Carol? The old lady?” Rick asked. Caleb only shook his head. “Did he ask you to?”
“No. She was… she was already dead when he called me for help.”
“Help with what?”
“Just… doing a few things at… at her house. I never saw her. Just the blood. I knew she was dead, but I only found out what he did to her after… after you guys were at the scene. After it hit the news.”
“You can still walk away from this without a homicide charge, Caleb. You don’t have to have that under your belt. But if this guy kills me, even if you don’t pull the trigger, you’ll be charged for it too. Conspiracy to commit homicide at a minimum. But you don’t have to go down that route. You can walk away from all of this.”
“I don’t care what they charge me with, Rick. I won’t be alive to see it,” Caleb said.
“What?”
“After this is over, I’m joining my wife. My babies.” Caleb let out a breath, the first sound he’d made all day that seemed relaxed, calm. “I’m going home, once and for all.”
“Jesus, Caleb,” Rick whispered.
“No. It’s where I want to be. Where I need to be. I’m not meant for this Earth anymore. Haven’t been for quite some time.” Caleb cleared his throat. “But I still won’t let him kill those kids. They’re pawns, not targets. You have my word on that. Now get out of the car.”
“Before you… join your family, will you… will you tell Heidi it’s gonna be okay?”
“Sure.”
“I need to know you will, Caleb. I need to know she and the kids will be okay.”
“I’ll tell her.”
“Thank you.”
“I’m doing it for her. Not for you.”
“I know. But she won’t be in the mindset to thank you when you talk to her.”
“Get out of the car, Rick.”
“Yeah,” Rick whispered. He pushed open the door and stepped out into the cold. Caleb followed, reaching behind Rick to close the door. “Up to the lake?”
“Yep.” Caleb nudged Rick forward with a quick push of the gun into his spine.
Rick drew in a deep breath before forcing himself to start walking. He could see three figures on the ice. The closer they got, the more he was able to make out Logan and Bonnie. The man’s back was turned to him, but he could unfortunately make out the axe he held at his side.
“He’s got the axe with him,” Rick said.
“It’s not for them,” Caleb said simply.
“You’re going to stand here and watch him behead me?”
“I don’t exactly have to live with the memory of it for long. Besides, how he carries out justice doesn’t matter to me, so long as it’s carried out.”
“How long did it take him to brainwash you like this, Caleb? How long did it take him to turn you into the same kind of man as the one who killed your little girl?” Rick asked.
“You shut your fucking mouth.” Caleb shoved him forward. “One more fucking word, and I’ll make sure your boy gets a front row seat to watch your head roll.”
Rick nodded. With everything else ‘Zak’ had talked Caleb into, he couldn’t quite put it past the man to follow through on that threat.
“Daddy!” Logan exclaimed.
Rick couldn’t help but run to his boy, but ‘Zak’ stopped him from getting too close with the blade of the axe pressed flat to his chest.
“That’s far enough.”
Rick finally got a good look at the man. “Gerry?”
Gerry smiled. “Rick. So glad you could make it.”
“I-I don’t understand. Wh-why… why would you do this?”
“Gerry?” Caleb asked before Gerry could answer. “Why would he call you Gerry?”
“Because it’s the name I use at the school. It’s fine. Don’t worry about it.”
“But he said he doesn’t forget the victims or their families. So he should know… who you are.”
“I told you he’d say that to you. I told you he’d try to get into your head. Why would you let him get into your head?” Gerry asked. “Even after I warned you? Even after I explicitly told you what he would say to you?”
“But he remembered my name,” Caleb said. “A-and my girl. And my wife. My son. He remembered.”
“He has access to the case files, Caleb. You can’t be this stupid. This naive.”
“Please let me give him my coat,” Rick interrupted. “Please. He has to be so cold. He’s just a little boy.”
“Did you check him for weapons?” Gerry asked. Caleb only nodded. “And he’s clean?” Again, a silent nod. Gerry pulled the axe away from Rick, using it to gesture to where Bonnie and Logan were knelt on the ice.
“Thank you,” Rick whispered. He shrugged off his coat as he hurried over to the kids. He dropped to his knees and pulled the coat around Logan, zipping it up all the way to the top. He wrapped the boy in a hug, his little head tucked under his chin. “Has he hurt you?”
“He shot Mister Biggs,” Bonnie whispered, her voice breaking. “I-I think he’s dead, Rick. There was so much blood.”
If his eyes hadn’t stung with tears before, they sure as hell did now. “You shot Jeff?” he asked, chin still resting on Logan’s head.
“I gave him a chance to leave, Rick. He pulled his gun on me. I didn’t have a choice after that. You understand.” Gerry clicked his tongue. “Stupid, stupid. You fuckers are so damn cocky, always assuming you have the upper hand. But you don’t. There’s nothing about you that makes you… special. You don’t have anything that the rest of you don’t. You were simply given a badge and a gun. Nothing more.”
“Where… where’d you get him?” Rick asked, his voice thick.
“Three shots to the gut. I figured if he wanted to fight so hard for you, I’d make sure he suffered for it.”
“My God,” Rick whispered, closing his eyes as a tear fell from his jaw and into Logan’s hair.
“This was only ever supposed to be about Rick,” Caleb said.
“It still is. Casualties of war, Caleb. It’s just how it goes,” Gerry said.
“B-but this isn’t war. You didn’t have to kill another one of them. That other deputy, he had nothing to do with it.”
“Whose fucking side are you on, Caleb? Ours, or the man who killed your little girl?”
“You’ll be safe,” Rick whispered as Caleb said something about them going too far. “I-it’s me for you. So once you’re free, I want you to grab Logan a-and run for the parking lot. Your car is there. The keys are in the ignition.”
“Oh, my God, Mister Downs,” Bonnie whispered. “I can’t do that.”
“You can, and you will. You will save yourself, and you will save Logan. Do you understand me? That’s your job, Bonnie. Okay?”
“Mister Downs—”
“It’s your job. Last one, okay?”
“Okay,” she whispered, her voice shaky.
“Come on.” Caleb grabbed Rick’s bicep and pulled him to his feet.
Rick turned to face Gerry again, arms crossed over his chest to try and keep himself as warm as possible. “The blood in the basement…”
“Stop,” Gerry said, eyes focused on the axe as his fingers dragged across the sharp edge. “Your crime-solving time is up, Rick. That part’s over now.”
“We never were able to find a father for him. There wasn’t one on his birth certificate,” Rick said.
Gerry’s fingers stilled, eyes lifting to Rick’s face without any movement from his head. “Doesn’t mean I didn’t love him.”
“Oh, my God.”
“Who’s he talking about?” Caleb asked.
Gerry held up a hand and patted the air a couple times, signaling for Caleb’s silence. “That’s between me and the deputy. Don’t worry about it.”
“The effort you would’ve had to go through to… to find me. To come here. To… Oh, my God.”
“Planted myself right in the middle of your little town. Right in the middle of the school. Right in the middle of your kids’ lives.” Gerry walked around Rick, shoving him to his knees as soon as he was behind him. Rick’s palm skidded across the ice as he caught himself before his face could take the impact too. “Watched them grow. Watched them learn. Watched you dote on that little boy, just like I used to with mine.”
“I-I don’t understand, Zak. You—”
“This isn’t about you, Caleb,” Gerry said.
“Not about me?” Caleb asked. “I have lost everything. Every single Goddamn thing that ever mattered to me. Every single thing I ever loved. All gone. A-and you… I-I let you convince me that all of that loss was because of Rick, b-but he’s… he’s right. He was right. A good man wouldn’t have done all you’ve done. A good man wouldn’t have made me help him clean up a crime scene. A good man wouldn’t behead an old lady and kidnap a teenager and a little boy.”
“Goddamn, Dep. You really played around in my boy’s head, huh?”
“I was just giving him some perspective.” Rick grunted as Gerry swung the handle of the axe into the back of his head.
He shoved him to the ice, a foot planted between his shoulders. “He does not need your perspective on things, Deputy.”
“Daddy!” Logan cried out, trying to wiggle himself free from his binds.
“You control your boy, Rick. You won’t like what happens if you don’t.”
“Logan!” Rick shouted, his voice far more panicked than he’d hoped it’d be. “Buddy, you just stay there, okay? It’s okay. Y-you just keep your eyes on Bonnie, okay? Talk to Bonnie.”
“Daddy, I’m scared.”
“I know, buddy. I know. It’s okay. You’re gonna be okay. You look at Bonnie, baby. At Bonnie, not at Daddy. It’s okay.”
“Mm. Good boy,” Gerry said, lifting his foot from Rick’s back. Rick closed his eyes, letting out a breath that was about as close to relief as he was going to get. “When you killed… the children that you did,” Gerry said, oh so careful not to mention his son again, “you upset the very balance of the universe, Rick. It took years to get to this point, but it’s finally time to set that balance right once more. Once you’re gone, and that little blonde is gone, maybe Pitman too, balance will finally be restored, and the world will be right once more.”
“I know you miss your son—”
“My kid,” Gerry corrected.
“Your kid,” Rick echoed, his voice breaking. He forced himself to nod. “I know you miss your kid. I-I know that loss was so incredibly profound. But please, Gerry, please. Think about this. There’s no balance to restore. There’s no world in which killing me brings back your kid. Or Caleb’s girl, or his son or his wife. I-it doesn’t bring back any of them.”
“Oh, it’ll bring back mine. You and Bo are the last steps to assure that. Well, and Logan.”
“I don’t… I don’t understand. What the hell are you talking about?”
“Once you and Bo are out of the picture, all I need is the blood of an innocent. That’s it. And then my b—kid will walk this earth once more.”
“Oh, my God. You’re fucking crazy,” Caleb breathed. “Wh-what do you think you are? Some kind of necromancer?”
Slowly, Gerry lifted his head, gaze settling on Caleb and the gun pointed at him. “Lower your weapon, Caleb.”
“Who the hell are you? Because I know you’re not Zak. I-I knew you were pushing it with what you did to that old lady, to these kids. B-but bringing someone back from the dead? Killing the kid to do it? You’re crazy. You can’t be a good man. You can’t be Zak.”
Gerry pulled one hand from the axe, resting it on the gun tucked into the waistband at the small of his back. “My boy deserved to live just as much as your kid. He just needed help. Rick stole that from him, just like he failed to give your kid the chance at life she deserved.”
“You’re his father? Th-the fucker that killed them all?”
“Don’t you fucking call him that.”
“Oh, my God,” Caleb whispered.
“Put the gun down, Caleb.”
“No. I’m not going to let you hurt anyone else.”
“Caleb. Lower the gun.”
Rick lifted his head enough to spot Jeff’s gun in Gerry’s hand. “Caleb, he has—” The gunshot cut Rick off. Bonnie and Logan screamed. Rick flinched so hard he pulled something in his neck. Caleb crumpled to the ice, gun falling from his hand.
Gerry shook his head. “What a shame. You know how hard I had to work to convince him I was just like him? And you fucked it all up, Rick. First with your little newspaper article, and then with this.” Another shake of his head. “I knew I shouldn’t have sent you to the house with him. I knew you’d get into his weak little head.” He stepped back and kicked Rick’s shoulder. “Stand up.”
Rick drew in a shaky breath. Hands pressed to the ice, he pushed himself up to his knees, and then to his feet. “We had a deal. You… you let the kids go, and then… then you can… reset the balance.”
“I’m honestly surprised you bought that,” Gerry said with a little shrug of his shoulders. “Surely you’ve heard of the slaughter of the lamb? Blood of the innocent?”
“Gerry, please,” Rick whispered. “I know you want to punish me. I-I know you think killing me a-and even Bo makes it right. I understand that. But Logan and Bonnie? They didn’t do anything. Bonnie’s mom doesn’t deserve to lose a child like you did. Heidi doesn’t deserve to lose a child like you did. Your revenge is me. Bo. Jamal. But not them. Not these kids.”
“That’s cute, Rick. Really. But I’m not as weak-willed as Caleb was. You won’t be able to change my mind with begging and pleading. You won’t be able to toy with me the way you were able to do with him.”
There was no changing Gerry’s mind. Not the way there had been for Caleb. But he could still save Bonnie and Logan if he played his cards right. “Caleb needed to know you weren’t the man you were pretending to be. He needed to know you weren’t suffering his same loss like you claimed to.”
“You murdered my boy. I suffered just as much as any parent who lost a child.”
“His innocent little girl was murdered at the hands of your bastard child. In what world could that possibly be the same?”
Gerry pointed the axe at him. “Don’t you fucking dare.”
“Your son deserved a hell of a lot worse than death. What he got was the easy way out. That little fucker—”
Gerry swings at Rick with the axe. Rick barely manages to lean back out of the way. They struggle over the axe. Gerry slams the handle into Rick’s nose. Rick falls back to the ice. Gerry raises the axe. Three gunshots ring out. Gerry stumbles back a step before the ax falls from his hand, blade burying itself in the ice an inch from Rick’s head.
A little dizzy from the blow to the head, Rick blinks hard before turning toward the parking lot. Dallas and Bo run toward them.
Dallas shoved his gun back into its holster before squatting down to check Gerry for a pulse. “The sacrifice yourself method was a stupid fucking choice,” he said.
Rick closed his eyes, dropping the back of his head to the ice again. “I know. I couldn’t see another way out.” A pause. “Is he dead?”
“As a doornail.”
“Tragic,” Bo commented as he untied Logan’s wrists.
Dallas snorted his response as he rose back to his feet. “You ready to stand, Downs?”
“Not yet.”
“Should probably see a doctor. Hit the ground so hard, I could see your head bounce off the ice from the parking lot.”
“Yeah, it… it feels like that’s true.”
Logan, free from his binds, crawled over to his father and practically collapsed on top of him, arms wrapped tightly around his neck. “Safe, Daddy?”
“Safe,” Rick whispered, burying a hand in his son’s hair. “Safe.”
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