Surgeon – Chapter Thirty – WhispersConfusions Books

**A/N: Vote for book two is included at the end of this chapter

NOT EDITED

Chapter Thirty

7:12 PM; CLINSTONE POLICE DEPARTMENT, LAB

“What you did today was unsafe, reckless, and stupid,” Jacob said, arms crossed over his chest.

“I know,” Bo said, shoving his laptop into his satchel.

“And so fucking awesome,” Jacob whispered.

Bo lifted his gaze to the detective’s face. “Now… I am confused,” he said. “Are you or are you not mad at me?”

“I’m mad because you could’ve gotten yourself killed,” Jacob said. Could’ve gone home in a casket, Bo thought. “But it was still awesome, not to mention incredibly brave. How’d you learn to talk to criminals like that?”

“I’ve talked down more than one criminal. The ones that don’t do it because they… get off on it are easier to talk with, easier to reason with.”

Jacob nodded. “Also, the fuck? I cannot believe you jacked my cuffs without me noticing. You could’ve been a criminal in another life.”

Bo smiled faintly, shaking his head as he shrugged his coat over his arms. “I’m just really good at doing things once I’ve put my mind to it.”

“Obviously. How’d you know Gordon didn’t want to do all of this?” Jacob asked.

Bo lifted his shoulders. “Lucky guess.”

“Nothing you do is a lucky guess.”

“That was. I saw an opportunity, and I took it,” Bo said. “What about Andrew?”

“Three officers are at the hospital to arrest him now,” Jacob said.

“Good.”

“You’re insane, you know. I didn’t want you in that building, you refused to stay in the cruiser, you wouldn’t take a vest, and then you got a damn gun pointed at you and walked your ass right up to the man holding it.”

Bo cleared his throat. “You do insane things when you aren’t sure you want to live, Detective,” Bo said, lifting the strap of his satchel over his head. He tugged on the strap, resting it snuggly against his shoulder. “And you never feel more alive than you do when someone else is finally in control of pulling the trigger that ends it all. That was the only time I have ever felt free in any recent history.”

“You’re still…?”

“On the edge?” Bo asked. “More or less. That feeling doesn’t just go away, Detective. I spent a long time believing I was worthless, and when I got adopted, I started to believe I was worth something. And then… Well, and then Dallas packed up shop and ran away without a single goodbye and someone convinced me I was useless again. The feeling’s always there, it just waits until I’m at my weakest to come back out. I don’t control that,” he said softly.

Jacob laid a hand on Bo’s shoulder. “You’re worth everything that every other person is, Bo. You’re a human being, and that makes you worth something.”

“Thank you,” Bo whispered.

Jacob nodded. “Take care of yourself tonight, Bo. You did a great job today. Hell, you did a great job every single day that you were here,” he said. “I’ll see you tomorrow morning. Get some sleep.” A pause. “And, uh, if things get too dark? Inside your head, I mean? Call me. No matter the time. Okay?”

Bo smiled faintly. “Sure, Jake.”

8:00 PM; CLINSTONE, BO AUSTEN’S HOUSE, KITCHEN

Bo ripped off a small piece of pizza crust and held it out to Acamas. With a short purr, she snagged the crust from him and lay down on the tiled floor, gnawing away at it. Bo smiled, biting into the end of his pizza. When his phone lit up, he set the slice down, wiping his hands on his napkin.

Bridget Decker had texted him two words: Of course!

Bo felt his shoulders relax. And for just one silent moment, he closed his eyes and threw out a thank you to any God that wanted to listen, a thank you for letting him know someone as judgment-free as Bridget Decker, who would still go out of her way to pick him up at the airport when he arrived in Los Angeles, despite how many months he had spent ignoring her texts and calls.

Thank Jupiter for Bridget Decker.

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